When DFA records founder, James Murphy dropped his debut LCD Soundsystem full-length, it’s lead off track was “Daft Punk is Playing at my House“.  Now it’s 5 years later and the electro-dance maestro is continuing to demonstrate his affinity for cybernetic organisms and house parties.  The latest LCD release, This is Happening is a really solid album (especially, the opener “Dance Yrself Clean”), but I wasn’t immediately sold from the first single, “Drunk Girls“.  The song “Home“, on the other hand, is much more representative of the overall sound on the new release.  What makes it even better is the crazy new video for “Home” that has just hit the interweb like a busted computer monitor .  As you’ll see for yourself, it’s part Pinnochio, part Iron Man, and entirely pretty awesome.  It’s got everything: cocaine, robots, lite brite pegs, foil, orgies… everything.

If you pay attention at the :46 and :52 minute marks, you’ll even notice that the Geppetto-looking bastard in this video has a grenade just chilling out on the trunk by his desk lamp.  You may also recognize the Tron shirt that the party goer is wearing at the 5:12 mark from the post that we featured about the design back in April.  Furthermore, you may remember from our post about the Tron Legacy trailer/updates from last year that none other than Daft Punk will be scoring the soundtrack to the new film [see how I tied that altogether like that & took it full circle?].

Alright, then… here it is:

Click here to view the embedded video.

DETAILS:

Directed by Rick Darge / Funwunce

Produced by Mark Armes / Funwunce

Concept by Rick Darge & Mark Armes

Art Direction- Shelby Hohl & Mark Armes
Assistant Director – Mark Armes
Shooter/Editor – Rick Darge
Colorist – Jake Blackstone, MOD Color
Gaffer – Jeff Fountain

Starring Rick Armes, Fabian Vargas, Elena Vann, Arthur & Felicia Bates, Tom & Josh, Osker Koranad0

Shot on location in Houston, Texas 2010

To peep more work by the Funwunce art/design collective CLICK HERE
To visit the LCD SOUNDSYSTEM website CLICK HERE
You can purchase This Is Happening from HERE”
To buy the shirt “My Other Ride is a Light Cycle”, use THIS LINK
Get the book Build Your Own Robot from HERE

On Christmas day of 2006, James Brown died at the age of 73.   The official cause of death was determined to be congestive heart failure, brought on by complications with pneumonia.   To anyone that remembers his haggard mugshot and takes into account the age of this man and the life he lived, it shouldn’t have been much of a surprise.  He was an amazing innovator who had a great run and left a stamp on the world forever, but it appeared that “The Hardest Working Man in Show Business” was all worked out.  Although the 3 separate New Years Eve performances/appearances that he was slated to make were canceled due to his demise, that didn’t mean that the spectacle was over. In fact, there was 3 separate memorial services held for him instead.  The first was at the Apollo Theater in NY on Dec. 28th, followed by a private memorial for family and friends in North Augusta, SC on the 29th, and then another large scale event on the 30th at James Brown Theater in Augusta, Ga.  Throughout these various services/presentations, the following was included: a open gold casket, a white glass-encased horse drawn carriage to transport it through the streets of New York, nachos, Michael Jackson, Bootsy Collins, a dance by MC Hammer, costume changes for the body, and more (yes… we’re fucking serious).

As is far too common these days with the deaths of celebrities, and even more-so legends, there was a lot of disputes regarding both Brown‘s will and where his final resting place had been.  Much like we witnessed last year with the death of Michael Jackson, family members and others actually argued about where to rest the musician’s body.  They had already transported it all over the goddamn East Coast as it was, so I guess they figured that they could shift it around a bit more.  I’m sure it’s all in keeping with whatever they feel James would have desired because, honestly, who wouldn’t want their lifeless corpse dragged around by horses, redressed constantly, put on display, and then buried and reburied after their death?  First his body was temporarily placed in a temperature controlled room at his estate, before being moved to an “undisclosed location“, as his common-law widow, Tomi Rae Hynie, and his children viciously argued about where it’s permanent resting place should be.  It only took a little over 10 weeks after his death for both sides to come to an agreement “amicably”.  The decision was to build a public mausoleum and, in an effort to keep milking the cash cow, transform the former legends estate into an attraction the likes of Graceland.  Until then, it was chosen for the body to be held temporarily in a crypt at the home of Brown‘s daughter Deanna Brown-Thomas.  Another private ceremony was held at Thomas‘ home, which was officiated by Reverend Al Sharpton, just like the previous 3.  Since that date on March 10, 2007, this is where the body has been laid to rest (or rather, “SNOOZE”) for the last 3 years.  Or has it?

As reported by the New York post, a 48 year-old woman by the name of LaRhonda Pettit is actually claiming that JB‘s body has gone missing. Although Pettit is not one of James’ 6 children that were listed in his will, she is reported to be “one of 12 people to come forward since Brown’s death claiming to be one of his illegitimate kids“  and she has actually passed a blood test to confirm it.  How she is sure that the body has been removed, we don’t know.  What we do know is that she is convinced that her illegitimate father’s death was actually a result of foul play.  Although she acknowledges that he was a 73 year old man with a history of repeated drug use, by stating, “‘It was common knowledge that my daddy took illegal drugs,” she follows it up by claiming, “He was also hooked on various prescription painkillers.  At the very least there were enablers who helped cause his death.“  Pettit also believes that the removal of the body is a part of an elaborate plot to prevent her from finally getting an autopsy done on the corpse.  Much of her suspicions stem from her claim that one was never officially conducted.

I’d like to believe that, if his body is indeed missing, it’s because James Brown got tired of the bullshit, got up by his own damn self, and simply danced the fuck off.  My other vision is very similar, however it involves a re-animation effort by Dr. Funkenstein.  Wherever zombie James Brown is right now, I hope he’s breaking off some crazy-sweet dance moves like the ones below.

Click here to view the embedded video.

WARNING: Zombie Sex Machine on the Loose

If you see zombie James Brown, we request that you do not try to apprehend him yourself.  Please call authorities.  Please also keep in mind that professionals are the only people who can adequately assess if his speech is of the undead or original James Brown himself.

On Sunday night, Sean “Har Mar Superstar” Tillmann and his crew of band-mates rolled into Seattle.  The second to last show of their West Coast tour was held at Chop Suey, and it was the fucking jam.  Before his set, I sat down and conducted an interview with Tillmann, which was filmed with a flip video camera.  Two other past Monster Fresh interviewees/friends were also in attendance at the show: artist, Thea Wolfe and musician, Kimya Dawson.  Although it would have been nice to see a little more movement from some in the hipster Seattle crowd, we still had a full-on R&B dance party throw-down.  Some of this was recorded on the flip cam too.

The next morning I woke up with a message from Thea, who had been messaging  on Facebook with Har Mar bassist, Denver Dalley.  They band finally had a day off and wanted to go to a dance party, before heading up for their last show in Canada the next day.  Thea was set to throw it at her house.  Although the last minute party still went down, and went down well, Tillmann‘s crew never made it.  After partying and traveling for 6 straight days, their bodies decided to crash out under them and use the day off for what it was intended for… regeneration.

I still need to go through my footage and decide how I want to edit and present the material.  Until I am able get all that shit together, however, we’d like to tide you over  by presenting you with a recently posted Har Mar Superstar tour video that was filmed on a  flip camera of their own.  In this video, taped on Jan. 22nd,  Tillmann shows of his dance skills and expresses his love for pop-star Hannah Montana by singing along to her hit track, “Party In The USA“, while driving a van up I5 to Portland.

To view more photos from the Seattle show, as they are uploaded, you can visit the FLICKR set by clicking HERE

If you have any Tillmann related photos, join the Har Mar FLICKR group and upload them HERE

Sure, the thunder clap cannot raise the dead, but it can definitely raise awareness.  If we can all just look past the prejudices that divide us and into these beautiful gyrating lumps of liberty, I am more than confident that the reflection will be red, white and blue.  Not black and white.

This video was originally posted on Worldstarhiphop.com, a site that can boast an “Official Honeys” page, which features a collection of amateur, pornstar, and model ass shaking videos.  Below is the original caption that they posted on WSHH, along with the cemetery footage above (the caption is unedited for grammar…. clearly):

One of our viewers sent us this footage. They reports “Some kids shakin they ass on people graves. SMH what has this world come to?”

By now, you’ve probably seen the sketchy, and now infamous, images above.  The mugshots are of Vince Shlomi (aka: Vince Offer) of ShamWow! infomercial fame and were taking back in Feb. 2009, after an altercation with a prostitute in Miami.  For those of you who are unfamiliar with the story, Shlomi was arrested for slapping the hooker across the chops repeatedly, resulting in fractures and lacerations all over her face.  The blood on his face corresponds with his claim that the woman had bit into his tongue and that he was forced to lay his goon hand down in an attempt to get her to release it.  If you look into Offer‘s past, you’ll see a history of other questionable moves, including a terribly misguided and vulgar comedy movie ,as well as three separate, bizarre lawsuits that he tried to file against The Farrelly Bros. , Anna Nicole Smith, and the Church of Scientology.  For the large majority, who were only aware of Shlomi from his ShamWow! and Slapchop infomercials, the arrest was shocking and extremely incriminating.

After the scandal, the airing of both commercials slowed tremendously.  At the end of June, Shlomi‘s arch rival and Oxyclean pitchman, Billy Mays died of complications relating to cocaine use and an existing heart condition.  Since, then, I began to see Shlomi‘s commercials resurface slowly, but his presence hasn’t ever really been as strong as it was before the release of the mugshots…. until now.

A couple of hours ago, I was relaxing on my couch when I realized that the the Slap Chop information was on television.  I was a little faded and thought that I was imagining it at first, but something was definitely different.  There was a song playing in the commercial that featured a crazy remix of the dialogue, processed through an auto-tuner and mixed over a techno beat.

The video above was created back in April by a Massachusetts DJ named Steve Porter, and placed on Youtube.  It spread around fast, becoming an internet sensation and, in July, Vince Shlomi made a deal with Porter to turn his “Rap Chop” music video into an official, airing infomercial for the product.  The actual infomercial that I saw today was almost identical to the video above, except there are a few differences.  Of course, the commercial was trimmed down slightly due to it’s length.  The other issue was with the copyrighted Breakin‘ material, which was replaced with a corny, suburban-looking B-Girl dancing around to the dance mix on a sound-stage.

Shlomi is nothing if not opportunistic and, instead of simply letting his arrest record overshadow his business interests, he made the next obvious move….he used his new found “street cred” and marketed himself as a rapper.

The DJ Steve Porter and Offer collaboration isn’t dead quite yet.  Today, Porter made the following statement from his twitter account

“….we have a debut of the Shamwow Jam coming soon to TV’s as well”

Due to the immediate response of the first video, the “Jam Wow“  follow-up remix was created for the ShamWow!, back in May.  This second video contains even more copyrighted material, this time from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and the movie House Party, so I’m sure that this is going to have a few re-edits of it’s own.

Check it out, but don’t get too excited.  I don’t know what it is exactly but, as ironic as it sounds, something about the sequel just doesn’t have the same “WOW” factor.

Seeing this mini-film finally ties each of the teasers together, which all appear to have been pulled from and created during this video shoot.  Just like the teasers, the “Tall Boy” video features appearances by Eric Wareheim, Alia Shawkat and Eva Mendes.  Push the fucking play button and check it out fools!  Then scroll to the bottom and read on, because I’m hopped up on pork sandwiches and TWIX and I want to bark some more orders at you.

The new Har Mar album Dark Touches has an official release date of Oct. 13th, but the pre-order is definitely the way to go.  It’s crazy cheap for everything that you get and there’s 3 different order options, 1 of which come with an autographed copy.  The soul machine, Superstar, has been flying low on the U.S. radar for the last few years, but I see this new release blowing up like Serena Williams at a line judge on the Challenger and getting more play than Papa John Phillips with a rig full of coke at a family reunion. [Sorry, I'm trying to maintain my puns like an ointment and make them topical]

Har Mar Superstar has a revamped site that looks great so, while you’re there placing your order, make sure to peruse around and give it a once over, like a booty at the club.  I even happen to have a photo-set in the gallery over there, which can be viewed by clicking HERE.

Below are the ordering options available for Dark Touches.  If you order the album some exclusive content is available immediately and each package provides the option between MP3 or LOSSLESS AAC files.

The following details are taken via Harmarsuperstar.com

Order Dark Touches now, and Har Mar will front you album art, the song “Tall Boy” from the forthcoming album, and two EXCLUSIVE bonus tracks — “Just the Tip,” a racy, non-album collaboration with The Faint’s Jacob Thiele & Clark Baechle and a remix of “Tall Boy” by Professor LaCroix.

OPTION #1

(only $8.98)

Dark Touches – Digital Files Pre-order today and immediately you get: Track downloads: 1. Tall Boy 2. Just The Tip 3. Tall Boy – Professor LaCroix Remix Image download: 1. Dark Touches Album Art When the album is released, you’ll get: Immediate release-day acquisition of the digital files. MP3 or MP3+LOSSLESS

OPTION #2

(only $13.98)

Dark Touches – CD + Digital Files Pre-order today and immediately you get: Track downloads: 1. Tall Boy 2. Just The Tip 3. Tall Boy – Professor LaCroix Remix Image download: 1. Dark Touches Album Art When the album is released, you’ll get: A CD autographed by Har Mar, as well as immediate release-day acquisition of the digital files. CD+MP3 or CD+LOSSLESS

OPTION #3

(only $15.98)

Dark Touches – Vinyl + CD + Digital Files Pre-order today and immediately you get: Track downloads: 1. Tall Boy 2. Just The Tip 3. Tall Boy – Professor LaCroix Remix Image download: 1. Dark Touches Album Art When the album is released, you’ll get: A 180-gram, pink VINYL LP, which will also include a CD in a paper slipcase, as well as immediate release-day acquisition of the digital files. VINYL + CD + MP3 or VINYL + CD + LOSSLESS

It has already been 5 years since Sean “Har Mar Superstar” Tillmann released The Handler, his last full-length album.   The Har Mar persona has picked up steam in places like the United Kingdom, where Tillmann has even become a product/commercial spokesperson, but, for the most part, the artist has shelved his character to pursue other interests.  He’s been involved in numerous other musical projects, short films, and has even popped in with a Hollywood cameo here and there [Starsky and Hutch].  This coming October, the hiatus officially ends with Tillmann‘s latest Har Mar R&B Dance release, Dark Touches.

New tracks like “Tall Boy” and “Girls Only” were originally created for Britney Spears and The Cheetah Girls, but were rejected by their respective managements.  Tracks like these helped give birth to Dark Touches a few years ago, but it a took a while for Tillmann to realize that he was actually creating music that would work for a project of his own.  “I realized a song like ‘Girls Only’ is so much more amazing if I sing it,” he’s said. “I wrote that one for the Cheetah Girls a while ago, and I feel like Disney freaked out a bit after doing a Google search and seeing pictures of me performing in my underwear. I understand why they would pass on that”

My prediction is that Har Mar‘s return is going to be big.  The musical climate has changed over the last 5 years and, if people are so into shit that is as unlistenable as Lady Gaga, Tillmann‘s superior songwriting and intriguing subject matter is sure to create smash hits, both nationwide and at the club.  Dark Touches features guest appearances from such artists as P.O.S. [Rhymesayers collective], Adam Green [Moldy Peaches], and Greg Kurstin [The Bird and The Bee].  For the advertising itself, Tillmann has even recruited other connections and friends that he has made through the entertainment industry.  A series of six viral videos, created by LA-based creative collective Tomorrows Brightest Minds, are being released to promote Dark Touches.  One video features comedian Eric Wareheim [Tim & Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!], who has also directed a video for The Bird and The Bee.  Another video features Alia Shawkat [Arrested Development], Tillmann‘s co-star in the upcoming Drew Barrymore film “Whip It“, but perhaps the most shocking cameo comes from actress Eva Mendes.  All of the videos have a really cool space age vibe to them, incorporating such props as ray guns and rocket pops.  It’s a great start and, with a new website, movie roles, and a tour on the way, this should be a triumphant return.  We look forward to seeing what else Har Mar Superstar has up his sequined sleeve-length gloves in the future.

You may remember that we posted all six all the videos exactly one month ago and may even wonder why they were removed. Well, the answer to that is, in short, we weren’t “supposed” to have them yet. It wasn’t Har Mar, or even his camp really, that asked us to pull them. Nope… it was the label that had paid for the promotion and even the creators had leaked them early. We were offered an “exclusive” when they were reposted, if we pulled them, but the label never actually made contact with us again. Instead Tillman’s brother, who is awesome, gave us the heads up and, although only a couple are available at this point, we will be posting them in this section as they appear. Remember, they’re “VIRAL”, so spread them around like the Swine Aids. Also, be sure to get the free MP3 download of “Tallboy” below.

Teaser #1

(feat. Eric Wareheim)

Teaser #2

Teaser #3

(feat. Alia Shawkat)

Teaser #4

(feat. Eva Mendez)

Tall Boy MP3

To read our recent review of Har Mar Superstar live at Lebowski Fest, with extensive photoset, CLICK HERE

In 2002, two men by the name of Scott and Will realized that they could exploit the popularity of the film and formed a convention-like festival.  Since it’s creation, the festival has grown and grown each year.  Publications like Maxim, Spin, and even the Wall Street Journal have praised Lebowski Fest, rating it as a must attend event.  By this year, it has already become a nationally touring force across the continental US, with a two-day stop in each of the towns that it hits.  The first day is lightly performance based and includes a viewing of the movie, while the second day involves bowling and a costume competition.  “Exploit” may not have been the best word for me to use, considering that the creators are legitimate fans.  Then again, it may just be the perfect terminology to employ; this festival is not cheap.  I was brought out  to Lebowski Fest this year by two things.  The first reason was the fact that I actually won a pair of passes to it, so it was free.  The second, and possibly more important reason, was that Har Mar Superstar was scheduled to perform.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Har Mar Superstar

Lebowski Fest

July 20,2009

Fremont Outdoor Cinema

Seattle

My “special lady“, Kim, and I met up with M. Hersted at a local pub and then headed over to the show.  The Fremont Outdoor Cinema isn’t really a cinema at all, it’s actually just a parking lot.  The outside wall of a building is painted to project movies off of, weekly throughout the summer months.  I saw Easy Rider there when I was 15, so it’s been around for a long time.  Lebowski Fest tickets were $20, for the paying crowd, and that was just for the first night.  I was wondering how they were going to regulate entry fees for something like this, until I noticed that the festivities had actually been moved to the inside of the building that contained the projection wall.  Someone held a clipboard with a Will Call list that I, apparently, wasn’t on.  I talked my way through anyway.  It’s not the first time that I’ve had “work it” because of a guest list issue.

One of the main advertising angles was an appearance by Jeff Dowd, the real life inspiration for the character of  The Dude.  As mentioned in the film, Dowd actually was part of the Seattle Seven, members of anti-Vietnam group the Seattle Liberation Front who were charged with “conspiracy to incite a riot” at a courthouse back in 1970.  He was standing out front and taking pictures with those who wanted them, but he looked as if he’d much rather be smoking his cigarettes with a White Russian than white soccer moms and accountants.  Some random attendee dressed like Jesus Quintana came by and people began walking past Dowd to take pictures with him, instead.  A couple of other guys were selling posters of a Big Lebowski version of The Last Supper.  We finished smoking our cigarettes and went inside to see what this whole scene was really about.

The venue is nice and, although it’s only located about a block from my old apartment, I had never been inside before.  I knew that they would occasionally throw random events in there, like the Halloween rave Freak Night, and It was clear that there was plenty of room to do so sufficiently.  There was a merch booth selling shirts and other Lebowski related shit, 3 large screens set behind a stage, and a bar towards the back.  The screens were showing a short documentary about the festival and there were couches and seats, already completely filled with patrons watching it.  We went through the 21 and over section to get a drink.  “Uh, I’m just gonna go find a cash machine“.  A tallboy of Rainier and a small plastic cup filled with an incredibly weak White Russian cost me $10.  The ATM fee was $3 alone and I actually tipped them.  “Fucking goldbrickers!‘  What was I paying for exactly?  After the hype died down, I couldn’t figure out the difference between this and a Star Wars convention, except that there was less to do.  I was still psyched for the Har Mar show and assumed that things would pick up.  We moved towards the back and sat on the floor in the only spots left available.

After the video ended, the two creators of the fest took the stage dressed as bowling pins.  Between them was some guy dressed in a sweater and glasses to resemble The Dude from the film.  He looked as much like Jeff Bridge‘s character as any out of shape man who grew his hair and beard out to do so.  His connection?  Just some guy who they met from attending the festivals.  They thanked people for coming out and announced that Har Mar would be doing a special performance created for the night, later.  I went back out to smoke again and returned to see Sean “Har Mar Superstar” Tillmann on stage, dressed in a nuditard and wrapped in vines.

There was a sheet on stage that was lit with his silhouette and Tillman was reenacting the “cycle“, The Dude‘s landlord‘s dance quintet.  People were into it, but it didn’t last long.  After the dance routine, Har Mar picked up the mic and the disco ball kicked on.  He started to speak with his usual profanity and, for some reason, there were kids in the crowd.  “8 yr old’s, dude.“  He strutted around sensually, with a Ron Jeremy physique and a porn star-chic mustache, to original jams like “Body Request“.  He slowly pulled the vines from his hair mid-song and then whipped out his patented pseudo-headstand moves, which involves the portly entertainer supporting himself on his shoulder and the side of his face, while he continues to sing into the mic.  By this time, I had already scurried up to the front, hopping through to the all-ages section to get a closer view.  This was also around the time that I think he began to lose the rest of the crowd.  Still upside down, he was thrusting his hairy thighs into the air and performing little scissor kicks.

Har Mar‘s routine is very physical and his musical style consists of R&B and soul funk dance tracks in the vein of Prince and the Revolution.  I first heard of him when he did a show with my friend Mac Dawg, who used to perform a similar routine as a balding, scantily clad, hairy chested man singing R&B keyboard jams.  That show was at a place called Arrowspace in Olympia, Wa that eventually closed due to, what I believe was fire code violations.  The White Stripes, supposedly, played there before their big break, as well.  It was a small makeshift venue that was only about the size of my one room apartment.  Since then Har Mar‘s star has risen tremendously.  You may remember him as the disco champ Dancin’ Rick, the man who Ben Stiller lost a dance-off to in the Starsky and Hutch movie.  His last album, The Handler, came out in 2004 and helped boost him into stardom.  Since then, Tillmann has continued to tour with a rhythm section consisting of Fabrizio Moretti (The Strokes) and Tony Bevilacqua (Distillers) and working on other projects, such as Sean Na Na with Greg Dulli (Afghan Whigs/Gutter Twins) on backing vocals.  His work with Gruff Rhys (Super Furry Animals) and producer Boom Bip, as Neon Neon, was nominated for a 2008 Mercury Prize, he’s written tracks for acts as varied as The Cheetah Girls, and he took the stage last year to perform “Electric Feel” with MGMT at the TIM festival in Brazil.  Though his star status may have slumped in the US, Har Mar is still extremely popular overseas.  He is even a spokesperson for both LYNX deoderant and Vladivar Vodka in the UK.  Sure, they love him overseas, but the crowd at Lebowski Fest wasn’t coming around as smashingly.

Tillmann continued his seduction by peeling off his nuditard and down to nothing but a pair of leopard print, Paul Frank briefs.  Covered in sweat, he ran into the crowd with his wireless mic.  Writhing and working his pelvic thrusts, he climbed onto the arms of couches that had families still seated in them.  He squatted down, gripping his mic as he sang into it.  He then stood up, working his area alarmingly close to the faces of middles aged men and women that were in hysterics, partly from the humor and partly just from fear.  He reached down into his crotch and then reached up to his mouth, blowing into his fist as if his hand was exploding open and sending seductive magic into the sky.  He did this same move again later in his show and, I may just have been caught in a trance, but I swear I saw glitter release and fly out into the air.

When he returned to the stage, he caught his breath long enough to request that somebody get him a “fucking White Russian“, which he sipped on stage in his underwear.  He clicked his iPod to the next track, grabbed a pair of white jeans from a pile of clothes on a stool.  He slowly pulled them on as he performed his vocals.  He threw his hands up into the sky like an evangelist and put his hand to his ear like Hulk Hogan summoning more encouragement.  He continued to sing his erotic grooves while leaning back, dropping to all fours, crawling towards the crowd shirtless, and then rising to his knees with a tightly gripped mic to his face.  He finished it off by standing with his back to the audience with one fist pumped high.  He was screaming out things like, “Give it up for me!” and “I’m fucking awesome!”

Tillmann asked if anyone minded if he did his show “backwards” because he wanted to put on his socks.  He continued to slowly rerobe throughout the rest of his performance.  Next came a pair of silver shoes and his elbow-length, fingerless gloves with gold mermaid-like scaly sequins.  Still crooning, he pulled a Prince and The Revolution shirt with the sleeves ripped off over his face and, finally, finished off the ensemble with short-sleeve Menudo sweatshirt.  The artist continued to run out into the audience intermittently and climbed up and down the few stage steps on his hands and knees.  Sometimes he would just crouch down to sing , pointing his ass directly at the audience.  One woman was taking photos on the opposite side of the stage that I was.  Tillman stepped down to grind her while she was shooting and then, smoothly, grabbed and made out with her, before continuing his verse.  I don’t know if he knew her or not, but she went along with it and then went back to getting her photographs as he danced away.

He busted out favorites like “Cry 4 Help” and “EZ Pass” but also incorporated a couple of new tracks from his upcoming release, Dark Touches.  The one that I distinctly remember was a song called “Tall Boy“, which was originally intended for Britney Spears and, subsequently, rejected by the pop-star’s management.  She missed out, that song was the fucking jam, but I guess her “people” aren’t into perpetuating the image that she drinks oversized containers of low-quality beer.  Superstar continued to request praise from the unprepared audience and even demanded that they applaud like they wanted to “fuck” him.  I saw the petrified look on a 12 year old boy’s face that was sitting with his mother in the front row.  It was priceless.  “I have two more songs“, Tillmann began.  Then he finished by explaining that he had to them “Contractually“.  He announced that the next song would be “DUI” and asked if anyone in the audience had ever been charged with one.  When no one responded to his question, he stated that he knew that the people of Seattle must have DUI‘s and that’s why they have all the “fucking bike messengers“.  I saw that same 12 yr old‘s face smile after that one.  He finished off his set strong with the undeniable groove of the song  “Power Lunch“.

As I walked by to my “seat” I noticed people booing and talking shit.  “We’re talking about unchecked aggression here, dude.“  I also saw a few others staring at each other with looks of awe and confusion.  These weren’t the types of looks that just said, “Woah, that was much more than I had expected.“  They were more like reactions of, “What just happened?!  I was experiencing some tracers and then all I remember was an image of a neon leprechaun, vertigo, and…. I think… maybe a memory of some unicorn wrestling, demons, and blood.  I went blank, but…. did someone rape my face?!  WAIT!  Where are the kids?!“  As far as I was concerned, my night was made.  There’s nothing that I enjoy more than realizing that nobody else in the room is enjoying what I am at all.  Har Mar did his whole act at full-force and didn’t miss a beat, with or without positive crowd feedback.  He’s a true showman.  This entire Lebowski function was fueled by a crowd mentality, anyway, so no one was going to speak up too loud, without being sure that everyone else agreed with them. “These men are cowards.“  We went outside for a smoke and saw a Tillmann pulling drags off of one of his own.. shirtless, no less.

We came back in and caught the last 15 seconds, or so, of a Jeff “The Dude” Dowd speech, which must have lasted about 5 minutes at the most.  I don’t really think that much more could have been expected from a man who was the inspiration for one of the biggest slackers in the history of cinema.  Next on the agenda was a screening of the film itself, but first, we were told that there would be a special surprise.  The lights went down and the projection screens were quickly broadcasting a pre-recorded video message from Jeff Bridges.  Dressed as “The Dude“, Bridges apologized for not being able to make an appearance at the festival and explained that he was busy with prior obligations.  The actor placed on his old TRON helmet, to reference that his duties were related to his involvement in the upcoming sequel {see our previous post featuring TRON trailer & footage from Comic-Con}.  My back was aching when the opening credits rolled.  We were sitting on the floor and trying desperately to adjust to our obstructed view.  People screamed and cheered during the intro and then continued to call out the lines throughout the rest of the film; often at the wrong times and often not even the correct lines.  Others stomped around carelessly and knocked over the drinks of strangers.  “Hey, careful, man, there’s a beverage here!“  Some guy tried to post a chair up right in front of me, but noticed that I was looking pissed.

“Am I blocking your view if I sit here?”
“Yes.”
“Am I really?”
“Yes, you are.”

He moved, but I couldn’t figure out why I was sitting in a room and watching a film that I already owned with a bunch of squaking dipshits around me.  “Fuck it dude!” I decided to leave.  On my way out, I noticed the two creators of the festival sitting in a luxury tour bus out front.

Lebowski Fest isn’t exactly an “official” Coen Brothers event and has become its own entity.  That is, if you don’t count the endless amounts of unofficial Coen related merchandise, film viewing, poster art, etc.  I understand why The Big Lebowski is considered a “cult film”; it wasn’t a box office hit, but slowly grew an underground fanbase.  My question is, “At what point does the popularity of a film push it beyond that status?“  The wikipedia page for “cult film” defines them as films that have acquired a “highly devoted but specific group of fans.“  I agree that the fans at Lebowski Fest are highly devoted but, as someone who actually has enjoyed the film since its original release, I did not feel a connection with the middle-class families and frat boys in attendance.  I did not attend the second night with the bowling , costume competition, and trivia, but I’m sure that there was more of an opportunity for the crowd to communicate with and meet each other on a personal level.  Still, I would expect a “cult” film to have a convention once a year in a specified location, not to have the ability to have a multi-city tour across the the country over a few month period.  Like I said, I have no frame of reference as far as the bowling night goes, but I can’t honestly say that it’s worth it to pay for a function like this.  Beyond the $20 entry fee for the first night and the overpriced drink fees, the second night costs another $25 for the bowling event and the fine print reads “Bowling is general admission and not guaranteed“.  Not guaranteed?  If Har Mar Superstar wasn’t there, I would have felt that the night was a bust, because it would have consisted of little more than a video playing.  The Portland event featured a burlesque show in addition to Har Mar, while most of the stops don’t even have him on the bill at all.  If you are planning to attend the event, I would suggest checking in to what specifically is going on in your town first.  This “fest” is not for the type of people who need to write a check for 69 cents, like the fictional character that it is intended to praise.  It’s not exactly a “festival” and it isn’t really a convention either, but I guess that people seem to enjoy themselves.  I actually enjoyed myself too, but it was because of Sean Tillmann‘s performance and not  in spite of it.  To me, the most fascinating thing was that, for all the people who consider themselves to be part of some kind of counter-culture, Har Mar Superstar proved to be far too “counter-culture” than most of them could ever handle.  “Fucking amateurs!”

Har Mar Superstar‘s new album Dark Touches is scheduled for an October, 2009 release date and Tillmann will also be featured in the new roller derby film “Whip it!” with Ellen Page.  Until then, enjoy this classic footage of the dance idol singing “Cry 4 Help” and working his moves for industry execs in his attempt to get a record deal. {yes, that is hot sauce that he’s squirting onto his naked body}

Click here to view the embedded video.

{click images to enlarge}

U-Min (aka: Woomin) was a dance crew from Japan who’s name means “unknown”.  They have a strong foundation working with popping, the robot, and an “animation” dance style.  From my understanding, 2 of the members (pictured) had left the group to start a crew called U-Min No Kokoro (meaning “core” or “soul” of U-Min) but, last year, they appeared collectively in Missy Elliott’s ‘”Ching-A-Ling‘” video from the film Step Up 2: The Streets. Although the video features the crew dressed in homage to the Baseball Furies gang from the film The Warriors, it didn’t truly showcase what the crew was capable of.  I saw a video of them over a year ago, where they were performing on stage and it blew my mind.  I had planned to post it, but never got around to it.  Tonight I stumbled across another video from the group that triggered by memory; both are posted here.  Leave a comment and tell us what you think.  If you have any more info on the crew, feel free to drop that info here as well.

thanks,

-Dead C

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PmN9hs__Aos

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qcz-vgs-j0U