Find Zen In An MC Hammer Gif Synced Up To Aphex Twin

I’m posting this fully aware that you might not connect to what I’m about to share with you on the same level that I have.  Simply put, this might not be the post for you.  On the other hand, if this is the post for you, it might just be thee post for you.  And by that, I mean the post that you could really use right now.  The fact that you’re reading this out of interest at all is already a good sign, but let’s start with a pair of simple questions to gauge whether or not there’s even any point in continuing forth, in advance.

The first one…
Do you hate dealing with and are afflicted with holiday related stress?

And #2…
Is dumb shit on the internet at the top of your list of favorite shit on the internet?

I ask this because, it’s now officially December and that’s exactly where I’m at.  If your’e anything like me, perhaps you’ve recently gotten into another absurd dead-end social media back-and-forth with your own mother that only works to remind you that certain things remain lost causes and bottomless abysses draining energy like the puncturing vacuum jaws of some mythical vampire remora.  Maybe you have an endless mound of new garbage consistently piling up that you need to address daily, but don’t know how to prioritize and catch up on.  Did your kindergartener recently respond to his teacher’s request for him to switch spots on the carpet, because he was talking over her, by audibly and indignantly inquiring to himself, “What the fuck?

Well folks, I just accidentally stumbled across some weird form of zen, while doing separate things in 2 of the 40-some-odd tabs that I have open in my browser at any given moment.  As the title would imply, I bobbled and dropped some of my rich MC Hammer chocolate into a vat of smooth Aphex Twin peanut butter and, inadvertently, created a miniature IDM / pop-hop version of Darkside Of The Rainbow, set in the early 90s where Professor Marvel shuffles around in genie pants.  For reasons unimportant right now, I was searching google images last night looking for images of Hammer that had the word “Proper” superimposed onto them.  At the same time, I also happened to be listening to Aphex Twin‘s 1992 album, Selected Ambiant Works 85 – 92, in full, via a youtube stream.  What I wound up finding was an animated gif featuring Hammer busting moves that just so happen to line up perfectly with the album track “Tha,” which I was listening to at the time.  As I quickly learned, when they sync up together, it’s nothing short of hypnotic and it genuinely soothes me.  I’d find it completely understandable if one chose to draw a warm bath; plug in an essential oil diffuser, so it could spurt some lavender mist into the air for this one; and drift off into the zone with this sweet audio/visual mashup.  The remarkable thing is that, no matter where you come in at, the dance master, former Oakland A’s batboy, and current 3M spokesperson, will always catch the beat.  Even so, I prefer to just start it at the beginning of the track and welcome in the beauty that comes along with allowing it to gradually unfold. There’s over 9 full minutes of magic here, if you decide that you want it.

Since we’re not the ones to try and intentionally swipe something uncredited — that’s happened to me way too many times, myself — I want to point out that this gif is labeled with the url gifhop.tumbler.com. They did a great job with this little loop and it’s bringing me tremendous joy, so you might want to check them out and see what other gems they might have going on over there.

OKAY, then!  Without further ado…

Play this…

While you watch….
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

this

and repeat.

Dead C

Located in Seattle, Dead C is the founder/editor, as well as the principal writer and photographer, of Monster Fresh. Creating the site in 2007, he did so with a specific dream in mind. Unfortunately, being a muscle relaxer-fueled fever dream, it’s hard to recall all of the details.

I remember that my mom was there, but it wasn’t actually her in the dream, it was actually 70s heart throb, Jan Michael Vincent. And everything took place here, in this room… but it wasn’t actually here… it was different. The colors were washed out and, for some reason, there was a raccoon kicking it with us and it was wearing a holographic monocle.

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